The most precious thing for a person is yourself.
“If you don’t like it, you just don’t like it, there’s no reason why.
Just like a gust of wind blowing, you have to dust yourself off, turn around, and walk away quietly.
Then, forget about this person who doesn’t like you. “
A person who lives in this world should live for people who like him.
This is the best attitude towards life.
1. A truly strong person is not afraid of being disliked.
In “The Courage to Be Disliked”, the author wrote such a story:
The author has a young friend who, although he dreams of becoming a novelist, can never write anything.
He explained that he was busy with work and had limited time to write novels, so he had been unable to write any works and had never participated in any competitions.
but it is not the truth.
The fundamental reason why he doesn’t write novels and refuses to participate in competitions is that he doesn’t want to go out and be judged, let alone face the fact that he will lose because of his poor work.
He did not dare to face the outside world, worried that he would not be liked by readers, and always deceived himself and others.
There is a passage that says it well:
“All troubles are due to interpersonal relationships. It is your instinct to pursue the approval of others. People succumb to this instinct, so they cannot live the life they want.
Therefore, true freedom is having the courage to be hated.”
In this world, no one can avoid being hated by others.
If someone hates you, it may be because they have different views ;
Some people may hate you, or they may simply be jealous of you and envy you.
Don’t try to manipulate other people’s opinions. They are not that important to you.
In life, you can’t just accept what others say about you, and you can’t accept what others say about you.
What we have always lacked is not the ability to be liked by others, but the courage to be hated by others.
Living in this world and trying not to be hated by others is actually a very simple thing.
You just need to disguise yourself, compromise, and give up.
But insisting on yourself even though you know you will be hated by others, is the way of life for adults.
2. Instead of trying to please others, it’s better to love yourself.
To be gregarious and to be liked by others, many people will deliberately lower their profile to cater to and please others.
Trying to please others will only make you humbler and less valued.
In “War and Peace”, Tolstoy created the image of a pleasing personality-Sonia.
She is kind to everyone, even at the expense of her own happiness.
In her opinion, only in this way can she win the admiration and love of others.
But in the end, she was alone and no one liked her at all.
“To live for others, you are destined to sacrifice yourself, plucking your own wings to make clothes for others.
To live for yourself, you must know how to listen to your own desires, drink water and eat when you are thirsty and hungry, do not lie when you love or hate, and be gentle and strong will also have strength. “
People who truly love you will treat you like a treasure no matter what you look like;
If you don’t love yourself, no matter how hard you try, you will be ignored.
A netizen described himself this way:
“I suffered a lot during my first 20 years of life, and it was because I was too sensible. This was my biggest failure as a human being.
Being sensible means understanding other people’s affairs, understanding other people’s sufferings, and even sacrificing myself when I have conflicts with others.
However, I never do anything for myself, and I don’t understand myself. ”
To please others is to live in a way that others like, but it also gradually covers up the true self.
“When I looked back, I suddenly realized that all my efforts in life were just to make people around me satisfied with me.
To win the praise and smiles of others, I cautiously put myself into all the patterns and all the shackles.
Halfway through, I suddenly realized that all I had left was a vague face and a road of no return. “
The rest of your life is short, it’s better to love yourself than to please others.
Don’t deliberately please, don’t grovel, and maintain your last bit of dignity.
3. Being yourself is a lifelong practice.
Psychologist Rogers has a point of view called “Become yourself”, which means: the most precious thing for a person is yourself.
The most important thing in life is to live your life the way you like.
Zoe had a successful career as a news anchor and a well-known company manager but eventually suffered from depression.
When applying for college, her parents did not agree with her majoring in Chinese, so she had no choice but to choose business administration against her will.
After getting married, her first marriage failed due to excessive interference from her parents, and her parents also regretted it.
In 2002, she suddenly realized: “This is your wish, not mine.”
She resolutely quit her high-paying job, no longer lived by her parent’s expectations, and focused on studying literature and doing what she liked to gain inner strength.
In 2008, after “Meeting the Unknown Self” was published, she not only gained success but also found love.
In the book, she tells readers sincerely:
“They have their own opinions, preferences, or opinions about you, and that’s their business. You let them be themselves, and you have the freedom to be yourself.”
Choose to do what you like, and the whole person will be happy and optimistic.
But if you just bite the bullet and do things you don’t like, you will be dull.
When you take your eyes off others and focus on yourself, your life begins to blossom.
Just like the line in “Initial D”:
“ There is only one kind of success in this world, which is to spend your life the way you like .”
Being the truest self is a lifelong practice, and it is also the happiest thing a person can do.
In life, we often encounter people who don’t like us and are always against us.
Some people appear to make us discover our own flaws and shortcomings;
Some people appear just to tell us that just keep being yourself.
Pandering just for fun can’t bring you sincerity; flattery with false feelings can only make you feel wronged.
Don’t lose your happiness with people who don’t like you, and then forget your happiness with people who like you.
Being with everything you like and living for the people who like you is the best attitude towards life.
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