Raising a child who knows how to be grateful is worth a fortune,
but raising an ungrateful child is useless no matter how good he is.
My child, your parents do not want you to repay your kindness, but they hope you will know how to be grateful.
“A unique combination of three incompatible elements: wife, lover, friend.”
“You gave birth to me, your mother bowed to me, you caressed me, you care for me, you grew up and nurtured me, you cared for me and returned to me, you came in and out of your womb. I wish to repay the virtues that Haotian has done.”
The greatest blessing for a family is not to raise promising children but to have promising children who know how to be grateful.
The sorrow of parents: they give everything but cannot raise grateful children.
A discussion group with a name makes all parents tremble: Parents are a disaster.
Some of them complain about their parents’ poor upbringing, and some feel that they cannot enter the upper class because their parents are too poor.
The resentment towards his parents in his words made others feel chilled when they saw it.
This is the tragedy of parents: they give all their efforts, but they cultivate ungrateful white-eyed wolves.
In many families, parents shoulder the burden of life and provide their children with a greenhouse garden that is impervious to rain and wind.
But children are used to accepting and asking for things unilaterally, enjoying everything with peace of mind and not cherishing it at all.
Investigate the reason, why?
The answer is very simple:
Many parents often only care about their children having enough food and clothing and only care about their children’s grades, but they forget to teach their children to be grateful.
For a family, parents are the root and children are the fruit.
If there is something wrong with the fruit, there is probably something wrong with the root. If the child does not know how to be grateful, there is often something wrong with the family's education.
A child who doesn’t know how to be grateful is useless no matter how good he is.
If a child does not know how to be grateful, no matter how outstanding he is in other aspects, it will be of no benefit to the family and society.
Do you still remember the news about the foreign student who killed his mother?
A mother worked hard to provide for her children to study abroad.
This boy studied abroad for five years and often visited high-end places.
The annual tuition and living expenses alone cost almost 70,000 dollars, and my mother could only earn more than 1500 dollars a month.
When his mother could no longer provide high living expenses, the boy stabbed his mother with a knife at the airport.
Later in an interview with reporters, the boy said calmly,
He thought his mother was lying to him and was unwilling to give him money, so he was very angry and exploded.
Mother’s unlimited love and indulgence breed hatred and complaint.
For an ungrateful child, no matter how much his parents do for him, it will be normal in his eyes. Once the normal in his eyes is broken, he will feel resentful.
Shakespeare wrote in his “King Lear”:
Ungrateful children can bite people’s hearts harder than the sharp teeth of poisonous snakes.
The saddest thing in the world is that when parents are waiting for their children to be grateful, the children are waiting for their parents to apologize.
Family affection does not need to be reciprocated, but it deserves gratitude.
“Raise children to prepare for old age.”
But most parents love their children out of instinct and do not seek anything in return.
Educating children to be grateful is just to let them know that they are enjoying the contributions of others and that their lives are happy because of the contributions of others.
“Gratitude is the health of the soul.”
“With bad intentions, feng shui is useless; if parents are disrespectful, worshiping gods is useless.”
Family affection is not only one-sided love and care, but also the warmth and comfort of both parties.
Gratitude is not a burden of debt, but a motivation to move forward.
The girl leaned against the end of her grandfather’s bed, tucking him in the quilt for a while, and turning the pages of a book for a while.
Children who know how to be grateful will care and love the people around them from the bottom of their hearts, and do their best to do what they can for their families.
His understanding, strength, optimism, and gratitude will become a lifelong asset.
Gratitude comes from love; love is fulfillment, but also letting go.
Teaching children to be grateful is easier said than done.
The most important thing about gratitude is love.
In the old concept, “hitting means kissing, scolding means loving”, and punishing someone if they disagree is a kind of rudeness and laziness.
Later, “encouragement education” became popular. Everything was done according to the children’s wishes, and every detail was taken care of in terms of food, clothing, housing, and transportation.
But he treats the child’s feelings in a perfunctory manner, which is far from being called love.
When it comes to educating children, the methods of Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu are worth learning from.
1. The love between husband and wife moistens things silently.
If a couple lives with their children as the center, they will indulge and pamper them blindly;
If the relationship between husband and wife is bad and the family atmosphere is tense, the child’s psychology will also be affected.
On the contrary, if the couple loves each other, the children will also learn to behave like adults, learn to love and accompany them, and will naturally know how to be grateful.
2. Lead by example and influence others subtly.
“The role of role model is very important, and teaching by example is not as good as words.”
They never give instructions to their daughters in their education, but they infiltrate it imperceptibly.
The two of them loved reading. When their daughter saw them, she followed the example and gradually became enlightened.
Don’t be too strict with your children.
Let children play and learn, and there will be no separation in their hearts. While they grow up happily, their hearts will be filled with warmth.
Of course, I will give back to my parents and the world with warmth.
3. Let go appropriately and learn to be independent.
Nowadays, many parents carry heavy burdens and deliberately leave their children with a peaceful life.
But responsibility and gratitude are not achieved overnight.
Only when parents learn to let go properly can their children learn to fly on their own.
The greatest blessing for a family is to raise grateful children.
The cow refuses to eat grass and wants to repay his mother’s kindness.
I would like to pick the flowers of forgetfulness to express my gratitude to my mother.
The last thing she left in the world was her love and gratitude to her parents.
“Parents in the world, if you love your child, you must let him start loving you and the people around you from the moment he can do so.
This is by no means the selfishness of adults, but the foresight of thinking for the whole life of children. “
The so-called “teaching children to be grateful” does not mean to tell the children how difficult it is for their parents to be filial when they grow up.
Rather, it teaches children the ability to love, learn to love themselves, learn to love their parents and learn to love life.
Tell your children that life is not easy.
Tell your children that your parents do not want you to repay your kindness, but they hope you will know how to be grateful.
This is not the selfishness of parents, but a vision for the future life of their children.
May all parents in the world be treated with tenderness by their children.
“My parents don’t steal or rob, so there’s nothing to dislike about them.”
Terry and her husband finished their work at the construction site and went to school to pick up their children in dirty clothes.
The couple were still worried about whether they would embarrass their child, but they didn’t expect the child to say such a thing.
As parents, we often have such concerns. We often worry about whether we will embarrass our children.
Carefully protect the child’s self-esteem, but often forget to protect the child’s self-esteem.
We should let the children have a grateful heart and have the correct outlook on life.
“With bad intentions, luck is useless; if parents are unfilial, worshiping gods is useless.”
Only when children know how to be grateful will the following education be meaningful!
Children who don’t know how to be grateful
Why don’t children know how to be grateful?
The reason is often not that parents treat their children badly, but that they treat their children too well!
Parents all over the world are afraid that their love for their children is not enough, and they wish they could give everything they have to their children.
I have seen some real examples.
An aunt’s child in my hometown is now in high school, but she still needs her aunt to bring food to the table every day.
My aunt told me that one time she was a little upset and when she asked him to eat, she forgot to put the rice in it for him.
When he got to the table, he immediately asked, “What are you eating? Where’s the food? Do you want to eat air?”
Only then did the aunt realize that she forgot to serve him rice, so she hurried to the kitchen to serve him a bowl, but she forgot to take the chopsticks again.
“Where are the chopsticks? Do you grab it with your hands? I think you just don’t want me to eat, so I won’t eat!” After that, he went back to the bedroom, locked the door, and started playing games.
The aunt was very angry, but she couldn’t bear to talk about the child. In the end, she could only comfort herself and save the rice for the child to eat if he was hungry in the afternoon.
Later, the aunt was accidentally injured and broke her left arm. It was during the summer vacation at that time, but the child was at home and did not know that he felt sorry for the aunt.
Shakespeare wrote in his play “King Lear”:
“A child’s ingratitude is like your hand putting food into his mouth,
Children who don’t know how to be grateful will eventually punish their parents severely. Even if the child is excellent, he is just an excellent white-eyed wolf.
If parents love their children, they cannot spoil them all the time. Only by cultivating their children’s gratitude can education be meaningful.
How to teach children to be grateful?
It is really difficult to raise children. If you love less, the children will feel insecure. If you love too much, they will be called doting by others.
Do we all want our children to learn to be grateful?
But what exactly needs to be done?
1. Parents lead by example
When I was a kid, I often saw a public service announcement on TV. It was played by the actor Xiao Yu from Family With Children.
In the short film, the little boy accidentally saw his mother washing his grandmother’s feet, so he imitated his mother and brought her a basin of water to wash her feet.
It is said that many children brought a basin of water to wash their mother’s feet after seeing this advertisement. This is the power of role models.
How you treat your parents is how your children will treat you!
2. Be willing to use children
In many families, because of the doting on their children, the children have become a kind of emperor at home, getting everything they want.
Little do they know that in the long run it will be very detrimental to the growth of the child, and it is easy for the child to take everything for granted.
At the same time, it is easy to develop the bad habit of eating too much and can take care of yourself.
Therefore, as children grow older,
3. Don’t let your children get things too easily
Many parents will respond unconditionally to their children’s requests, but this is wrong. Things come too easily.
For children’s requests, you must consider whether they are reasonable and cannot blindly satisfy them. If they are unreasonable, you must firmly reject them and tell your children why.
Sheep have the kindness of kneeling to breastfeed, and crows have the kindness of feeding back. If children don’t know how to be grateful, it is the biggest failure of parents’ education.
And having a grateful heart is the foundation of a person.
Hayao Miyazaki once said: “No matter who meets and gets to know each other in the vast sea of people, everything will not be smooth sailing.
Teach your children to have a grateful heart. Children who know how to be grateful will be successful in the future.
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