When you reach middle age, please put away your generosity

2bebetter
5 min readMay 12, 2024

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Life is in a hurry and only lasts a hundred years.

When people reach middle age, putting away their generosity, guarding their kindness, and living a good life are more important than anything else!

Photo by Dmitry Tomashek on Unsplash

01. Don’t be too spoiled to your children

Someone said: “The greatest sorrow of parents is that they give everything but cannot raise grateful children.”

If you can’t bear the suffering of your children, you still have to be a “nanny” when you get old; if you can’t see your children being upset, you won’t criticize you even if you do something wrong; if you are reluctant to give to your children, you will empty yourself out of yourself with full satisfaction…

But the result is that the more they pay, the more some children take it for granted and are ungrateful.

As the saying goes, a loving mother often loses her son. Many parents gritted their teeth and shouldered the burden of life, only to end up with a lot of complaints.

Freud once said: “The main driving force for growth comes from separation from parents.”

Don’t give your child “everything they want.” Only by being appropriately “selfish” can children have the opportunity to come into contact with the reality of life. When they have experienced more hardships, they will naturally be stronger; when they have lost more things, they will naturally cherish them; when they have shouldered more responsibilities, they will naturally be grateful.

Therefore, learning to let go is the best support for your children and the greatest fulfillment for yourself.

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash

02. Don’t take “bad friends” seriously

There is an old saying in China: “Rely on your parents at home and rely on your friends when you go out.”

But another old saying goes: “Living with evil people is like entering an abalone den. If you don’t smell the smell for a long time, you will be transformed by it.”

Choose good people to associate with, and choose gentlemen to live with.

Some people say that the best friend is a wise man born in the world, a strong man in the world, a normal and sunny ordinary person.

The first two are difficult to meet, but normal and sunny ordinary people are accessible to everyone. It doesn’t matter their age, gender, or class, but they must have character rooted in their hearts.

A person’s most real capital is not beauty or money, but his character. Character is not only a person’s most lasting charm but also a person’s highest academic qualifications.

The same goes for making friends, and the same goes for being a human being.

The world is in turmoil, chaos blinds the eyes, and chaos clouds the mind. Only by adhering to this right path can you choose the most worthy person among thousands of people; choose the most meaningful one among thousands of choices.

The rest of your life is limited, don’t waste your time on people who are not worthy of it. Don’t refuse when you come, and don’t stay when you go, only then can life be free and happy.

Photo by CALIN STAN on Unsplash

03. Stop worrying about injuries

If we give someone a hand, the other person may forget about it soon; but if we step on someone, it may always be remembered in their hearts, so many people will linger on such harm and never forget the past.

As everyone knows, those who stare into the abyss will eventually be swallowed by darkness. The more resentment you have in your heart, the more painful your life will be.

Only by being open-minded can you be happier. For past hurts, you can choose not to forgive, but you cannot let go.

As the saying goes, if you look at the vicissitudes of the world indifferently, your heart will be at peace. In this short and precious life, the most important thing is to maintain a happy attitude.

“If a person can always be quiet, everything in heaven and earth will return.”

Only by calming down one’s mind can one achieve tranquility and be in harmony with heaven and earth. Being too entangled will often only disrupt your tranquility and make your life too tiring.

Let go of the burden of obsession, and your mind will become brighter.

Photo by Luke Bender on Unsplash

04 Let nature take its course for the rest of your life

Desire is the “god” in the heart, and the energy of desire is equivalent to the energy of “god”. The desire for external things is the instinct of life. Food, clothing, housing, and transportation are all desires. Without desires, there would be no life.

However, having insatiable desires and asking for too much is the beginning of a tragedy in one’s life.

There are many things that you don’t need to pursue deliberately. Sometimes the more you want something, the less you can get it. When you don’t want it, it will come unexpectedly.

The world of mortals is long, and I am over fifty. After more experience, I understand that the best attitude in life is to let nature take its course and be content with whatever comes.

In life, it is taboo to humiliate yourself to please others. Learn to “untie” yourself so that your life will not be tense and depressing.

“Rather than miss it, it’s better to yearn for it; instead of yearning for it, it’s better to let it go and let it go far away.” In this way, the rest of your life will not be in vain.

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2bebetter
2bebetter

Written by 2bebetter

"Exploring love & relationships. Providing advice, insights, and inspiration to inspire you to find & maintain healthy and fulfilling connections."